Okay, things are kind of routine here. Kids having sleepovers with their friends, gymnastics, soccer games, family outings on Sundays, and house work/projects that never end :)
It's all good!!!
We are coming to our final week before we hit the 120 day mark. That would be 120 days before our arrival day of July 1st in Germany. Of course our arrival date could change, we don't have our final departure papers. Even worse, they could tell us we're not going at all. I guess that's still a chance. We've done everything required of us at this point. Now it's just a waiting game. Once (or if) we get our final departure papers we'll be able to really get moving. We'll have passports to get (husband already has his), make arrangements for the movers and our car, change our health insurance and bank.
Okay, what a difference a day can make. Things are no longer "routine" or normal here.
I'm dealing with an issue of trust and lying. There are big lies and little lies, but when does a little lie become the last straw? How can you continue to trust someone who has told one too many little lies? I begin to wonder how many other lies there are that haven't been caught yet.
On another note, we know a German family here, we've been friendly with them. Had their daughter over for playdates, had dinner at their house, exchanged gifts, went out here and there, had long conversations........but lately things have changed. I've always sensed an air of arrogance and I can never tell if they are joking or serious. I just chalked it up to the German view of life. But rude is rude no matter what your nationality. When someone you know walks away and can't even say "bye", that's just plain rude.
I know Americans like this.......it's like they live in their own little world where everything they do is perfect and you are just someone who when needed or convient they will acknowledge or contact. Otherwise, your existence is unimportant because they are self-centered and arrogant.
I hear people talking on blogs about German arrogance. I think I will go crazy there if this is the norm. What's wrong with being polite, even if it's "fake" it's called MANNERS. Hasn't anyone taught the German's manners? Not from the experience I had yesterday. I'm hoping this is not true of all Germans as it is not true of all American's (but is becoming more true than not lately).
I'm not looking to become their best friend or even good friend.......I just wanted to be friendly and have the same courtisy given to me.
Am I missing something here?
It could be that she was just in such a hurry that she just ran off and not thinking of anyone or anything else other than herself and her situation that she forgot to say Goodbye.....or give a smile or a wave. It's sad when the norm anymore is to just be so caught up in ourselves and our own issues that we can't even be polite to others. We have become a sad, sad world full of self righteous individuals that feel they do no wrong, that they are the center of the universe, and that friendships, politness, manners and what not just don't matter anymore. It's a dog eat dog world out there. Everyone is out for themselves.
The worse part is that this is now becoming the norm and my children will have to live in a world like this. I hope they can find a few good people in their lives that are the exception to this, as thankfully I have. What will I ever do in Germany without them? Thank God for computers to e-mail them, airplanes to visit them, and telephones to call them and hear their voices and kindness and Geniune Friendship and love.
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4 comments:
Hi and thanks for commenting on my blog today! If you have any questions about moving to Germany just holler - e mail is on the sidebar of my blog. We'll probably be having another expat blogger meet-up in the fall so maybe you'll be able to attend.
And yes, some (but not all!) Germans do tend to have a different attitude toward the social graces and a certain air of arrogant indifference about them that can be hard to deal with at times unless you understand the German psyche. I've lived here since 1990 and it still bugs me. It bugs my husband too, and he's German! :-)
It will definitely be difficult to get use to. I tend to avoid my German friend because I just don't feel up to trying to figure out if she's just being impolite or joking and chalking it all up to her "personality" gets difficult after awhile.
I will look forward to the expat blogger meet up in the fall. I should be in Stuttgart by July.
I think Germany has a range of personability in its people about equivalent to the US. Maybe it's because I lived in Boston, one of the more closed cities in the US, prior to coming here, but the difference hasn't bothered me that much.
Just a story to contrast yours a bit for a different angle: We also had "a German friend" in Boston, who was a member of my husband's lab. He was as friendly, personable, and fun to be around as you could ever imagine. When my husband defended his thesis, the German friend took charge of the party afterward and ordered tons of German food from my husband's favorite place (Stiglmeier - I think it's in Illinois) and took charge of preparing it all. He got him a gift and called him his "German brother". He was as sweet as could be.
Also, expats are maybe not always the same in a foreign country as they are at home; it's such a different situation. Your friends could be very stressed, or feeling some extra longing for their home country brought on since you are moving there. Who knows?
Well they've lived here in the US for 6 years. They have a lot of National Pride, which I commend!! I think it is great to have pride in your country and heritage, but they seem to put down the US a lot and I find that insulting because this is where they came for work because they could not find any in their own country and here they are able to send 2 kids to private school, own 2 cars, have a nice home and still go back to Germany every other year for business and family.
I don't know what is up with her and you know what, I just don't have the desire or time to try to figure it out. I will surround myself for the last 4 months here with friends and family that aren't so "complicated" and I know enjoy my company and I enjoy theirs.
You come upon people like this no matter where you live and what your nationality!
I do find that a lot of Americans are becoming rude and selfish anymore. It is sad. Manners aren't being taught to the younger generation and everyone is plugged into some kind of electronical gadget for companionship. But that's another blog......how ironic is that!!!
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